proud

TOday i went to my sisters graduation. I am so proud of her. Graduating from middle school with a 4.o all three years. She achieved so much in middle school, leading her basketball team to an undefeated season and taking first in league to being in a math class that juniors in high school are taking. In life i know she will successful because shes strong and independent.
Next year in high school shes going to go up and beyond everyones expectations. my sister is an over achiever. In my opinion high school isnt ready for a freshmen like this. I know she will do well at pioneer. GOOOd luck nexxt year as an incoming freshmen. you'll enjoy your high school years.


LOVE YOU SISTER!

love hate relationship.

I love how you use to hold my hand
I love how you use to smile at me
I love those phone calls at night
I love those faces you made at me to make me smile
I love when i was upset you would always kiss me on the cheek
I love when you would blush every time i kissed you on the cheek
I love that whenever we went out it was only me and you
I love the way you hugged me
I love sneeking out at nights to see you

I could come up with a millions ways why i love you buh as time goes on you changed and i
stayed the same

I hate the way you dont look at me the same
I hate going in public and you acting like im a nobody
I hate how we cant even have a conversation anymore
I hate how things will never be the samee

Your the reason why my life is falling down. buh i guess sense your moving on you think i can buh reallly i cant i want you to see what im going through you think its easy for us to juss be friends buhh its not im not shuree if we can even be friends

reflecting.

Over the past year of school ive had many accomplishments and memories. During this past year, Ive learned that i pretty much only have one year left of school. when i was younger i would always think that i would be in school forever. now that forever is here, its hard looking at my past. Looking at all the good and bad times, all the memories of when i was younger, seen how much i have grown over the years.
now that high school for me is almost over, i need to start getting things straight. Focus on the things in life that are the most important. College is around the corner and i should be getting ready for that.
I think the thing i am mostly scared of is graduating. because after that what are people really supose to doo. Theres always people to prepare you for school and college and jobs but what about after that. after when school is donee.
there is like a million questions i could ask about everythinggg. in school people always tell you: thats to many questions, no more questions, keep your comments to yourself, but growing up people always told me to speak your mind and never stop asking questions.

At times, things get hard, fight through it and once you over come it, you'll be ready for anythingg.

stress.

Parents will talk and talk and talk about how it was when they were younger. They will tell us over and over and over about how they know what we are going through because they were once a teenager. but really they have no clue what im going through. Everyday I am changing into someone they will never understand. They always get on me about doing things, tell me whats right and whats wrong, but when you think about it, if they raised me right, i should already know that difference and i should be off on a good path. i keep repeating to my mom about how she raised me right and she will never have to worry about me. Life is so hard, its filled of obstacles and over time i will eventually get through them and accomplish what i need to get done.

Gone.

The worst feeling ever is when someone close to you, someone you can pretty much call your sister, just leaves without notice or anything. In November one of my best friends left. Her parents shipped her away and there is no way any of us here can talk to her. At first I thought she would come back, I never thought her parents would keep her away from her friends, buh its been over 6 months and no one has still talked to her. Its hard losing a best friend. The only person I knew that would always been down for anything. I could tell her anything and she wouldnt say a word about it. My parents treated her like a daughter. Now that shes gone its hard for me to actually trust people because now I think that once I trust someone there gonna up and leave. Now I have another super close friend, shes like my little sister. I trust her with everything. I call her and shes always willing to go out. I trust her with more stuff than i do with my actually little sister and now i just found out, her parents are going back to the Philippines and they are taking her with them. She leaves in 2 weeks and like everything just feels so out of place. Within a year, im gonna lose 2 people that I can pretty much call my sister. I hate when i become close to someone and them leaving. And its not like I don’t have people I can trust buh I treated them like family.
I thought everything was so perfect like everything fell into place last summer. I had the bestfriend I could call sister. The perfect boyfriend that would make me smile and cheer me up when im down. And around Christmas everything came crashing down. And once I built everything back up where I think everything is back to normal it comes tumbling down. Im just tired of everything. I tired of trying, im tired of fighting through things to make everything better because everytime I fight though an obstacle and everythings better, things end up tumbling down and im back to where I started.
I thought this summer was gonna be the best summer ever because this will be the first summer I have my license and im gonna have my bestfriend there with me. Everything would be all good, but now im gonna hate this summer. I want the pieces in my life to come together like it did last summer because right now everything feels out of place.
I would do anything just so I could go back in time and relive last summer.

independent

(adj.) not relying on another or others for aid or support.

Reflecting myself, I've came to a conclusion that no matter how many times I want to trust someone, where I think I know them well enough, I will never be able to depend on them. In life people come to many conclusions, so far my conclusion in life is that if you need things to be done you can only depend on yourself. In life people learn to be independent.

The key to life is to become successful in something you think can make a difference somewhere somehow. People get to being successful by being independent.